


Coming Out (Ghost Adventures)

by lastweekon



Category: Ghost Adventures (TV)
Genre: Drama, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Romance, agnst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-01
Updated: 2016-04-01
Packaged: 2018-05-30 14:38:06
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 14,328
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6427906
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lastweekon/pseuds/lastweekon
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Zak and Nick have been together for a while now and keeping it a secret is wearing on Zak's nerves.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Zak’s eyes opened as he felt the familiar touch of fingers running through his hair. He loved the feeling of having his hair massaged, provided he hadn’t just finished styling it. But first thing in the morning, he definitely didn’t mind it. He sighed, completely content as he ran his fingers over the hard chest he was using as his pillow.   
“Morning, sleepyhead.” Nick said, throat still thick with sleep.   
“Morning.” Zak said as he smiled softly against Nick’s chest.  
“I thought you were gonna sleep all day. I’ve been up forever.” Nick said, playfully disgruntled.  
“You could have woken me up.” Zak replied, returning Nick’s snark.  
“I wouldn’t dare poke the beast when he’s sleeping. Plus, you had me pretty well pinned down.” Nick laughed.   
Zak lifted his head to shoot Nick a playfully disapproving look before lifting himself up to straddle the younger man.   
“Well,” he said, grabbing Nick’s wrists and pinning them above his head, “The beast is awake and ready to be poked.”   
Zak lowered his face to meet Nick’s as he kissed him long and deep. He smiled as he felt the younger man begin to harden beneath him. Zak released his grip, running his hands over Nick’s hard chest as he kissed and nibbled along his jawline. Nick sighed as he began to move his hips, rubbing himself against Zak. Zak let out a whimper before catching himself and biting down on his bottom lip. But Nick didn’t miss the sound coming from his partner, and he let out a little laugh as he spoke into his ear. “You like that? You like when I grind on you?”  
Zak blushed at Nick’s words and how they made his cock grow even harder. He could have sworn he’d been in control of this sexual encounter just a moment ago.   
“It’s fine.” Zak answered, feigning indifference.   
Nick practically growled at the challenge, grabbing Zak by the waist, flipping him over and pinning his back to the bed. He continued grinding himself into Zak as he moved his mouth over his chest and ran his tongue over the tight nipples. Zak bit down on both lips, desperately trying to hold in his moans. Nick sat up, rolling his hips as he rubbed himself right up against Zak’s sensitive cock head. He smiled with satisfaction as Zak’s eyes rolled back.   
“Oh, God, Nick…” the older man groaned, unable to hold it in anymore.  
Nick stopped moving as he leaned forward, lips grazing Zak’s. “Is it still just fine?” he asked, hovering over Zak’s pulsing need.   
“Nick, please…” Zak whined, wrapping his arms around Nick’s waist in an attempt to pull him back into position.   
“You didn’t answer my question.” Nick said defiantly.  
Zak reached his own hand between them, grabbing for himself. But Nick caught his hand before he could get out the first stroke.   
“Nick! Please. I want you so bad.” he begged, running his free hand down Nick’s strong back and lightly scratching up the back of his thigh. Nick shivered, but held his ground. “You know you’re the best I’ve ever had. Please. I want you inside me.”   
Nick leaned back down to graze his lips over Zak’s. “And don’t you forget it.” he said with a low rasp that made Zak ache.   
Nick reached out, grabbing Zak’s cock and stroking it firmly as the older man’s breath hitched in his throat. Nick continued the rhythm as he scooted his own body down and between Zak’s legs. He began to kiss and suck his tender flesh as Zak panted and squirmed with pleasure. Nick knew the older man wouldn’t last much longer, but the look on Zak's face had him mesmerized. As liquid began to pool at the tip of Zak’s cock, Nick stopped abruptly, pulling a desperate whine from his partner.   
“Nick, what the fuck? I was so close.” Zak panted.   
“What do you think, I’m gonna let you off that easy?” Nick purred, massaging his fingers against Zak’s tip, collecting his precum. The soft touch alone had Zak hitching his hips up toward Nick’s fingers. He let an exasperated breath go as Nick pulled his fingers away.   
“Why are you torturing me?” Zak demanded, flopping his head back onto his pillow. Nick couldn’t help but smile. Zak was such a drama queen and Nick loved it. He began to slowly massage his slicked fingers over Zak’s opening, causing the older man’s hips to buck in response.   
“Do you want me to fuck you, or not?” Nick asked plainly. “Because if you’re not interested, I could always go take care of myself in the shower.”   
“No! I want you to. Please.” Zak answered desperately, swirling his hips to rub his opening against Nick’s fingers. His body ached with need as he felt Nick push a slicked finger in. Zak thrust himself against the finger, feeling it push deeper inside of him. Soon he felt a second finger slide in and he greedily accepted it as he moved faster against it.   
“Woah. Slow down, babe. It’s not a race.” Nick said, placing a hand on Zak’s hips to calm his rhythm.   
“I want to cum before you try to stop again.” Zak huffed.   
Nick laughed, kissing Zak’s thighs lightly as he slowly slipped a third finger into his partner. “I promise, I won’t stop again.” He bent his fingers, expertly grazing Zak’s sensitive gland and pulling a long moan from him.   
“Don't fuck with me, Groff. I want you inside of me right now.” Zak growled, grabbing a fist full of Nick’s hair. Nick thought he might shoot his load right then and there. The only thing hotter than a begging Zak is a bossy Zak. Nick wasted no time climbing up Zak’s body, kissing and nibbling his way up his chest. He grabbed Zak’s legs, putting one on each of his shoulders and lining himself up with Zak’s opening. He looked Zak in the eyes as he pushed himself in with one slow, deep thrust. Zak fought to maintain eye contact as the pleasure threatened to have his eyes rolling back into his head. Nick held his position, giving Zak a moment to adjust to the length inside of him before he began moving at a steady rhythm. As the wet warmth surrounded him, he fought back loud moans, preferring to concentrate on the sounds coming out of Zak's mouth.

Zak's pleasure was always a weakness for Nick and he fought hard to keep from cumming before his partner but he wasn't sure how much longer he could last.   
“You gonna cum, baby?” He choked out, a bit more desperately than he had intended.   
“Almost there. Faster, Nick.”   
Nick complied, wrapping a hand around Zak’s cock to stroke him towards release. It didn't take long, three strokes at most and Zak spilled his warmth between their stomachs. He clenched as he continued to spasm with pleasure. Nick held on, wanting to make sure that Zak was completely satisfied before allowing himself release. Soon Zak began to move his hips steadily, grinding himself harder onto Nick and smiling smugly as his face changed with each swivel of Zak's hips.   
“That’s it, Nick. Cum for me.”   
Zak grabbed Nick’s hand, putting two of his fingers into his mouth and sucking to the rhythm of his hips. That was all it took. Nick groaned loudly releasing into Zak before collapsing on his stomach. Nick breathed heavily into Zak’s neck.   
“That was…top five at least.”   
Zak scoffed into Nick’s ear.   
“So, I tell you that you’re the best I’ve ever had and I’m in your _top five_?” Zak pushed Nick off of him, sitting up against the headboard. Nick couldn’t help but let out a little laugh at Zak’s jealousy which resulted in daggers from the the older man.   
“Babe. Top five times together. You and me. You know you’re my number one.” Nick said, running a hand up Zak’s crossed arms. Zak shot a suspicious look at Nick.   
“I am?”   
Nick couldn’t tell if Zak was seriously surprised by this information, or if he just wanted to hear Nick say it again. But either way, he wanted to be sure he was making himself clear. He sat up to face Zak.   
“Of course you are. I’m crazy about you.” he said, sincerely. “No one has ever made me feel the way that you do. I love you.”  
Zak’s face softened and a smile pulled at the corners of his mouth.   
“You’re such a sap.” he joked affectionately.   
“You love it.” Nick quipped  
“I love _you_.” Zak said, leaning in for a long kiss. Zak scooted down a bit to lean his head on Nick’s chest and swing his arm over his stomach, dried cum be damned.   
“We should probably shower.” Nick said. Zak just grunted back in disapproval. “Don’t fall asleep on me again, Bagans.” Nick teased, running his fingers through Zak’s hair.   
“Well, then you better stop doing that.” Zak said, bringing a hand under his chin to rest on Nick’s chest so he could look him in the eyes. “If we’re not gonna sleep, what do you want to do?”  
Nick raised an eyebrow seductively.   
“We literally just finished!” Zak replied in disbelief. “I’m gonna need a few minutes. Damn.”   
Nick laughed shaking Zak’s body as the sound rose from his stomach.   
“I know, I know. You’re an old man now. Your body’s not what it used to be.” Nick joked, barely able to finish his sentence through his laughs.   
“Fuck you, Groff.” Zak said with a laugh. “I could cum circles around you. You just name the day. Just not right now. Too tired…” Zak said snuggling back into Nick’s chest.   
“Ok, we’ll save that contest for another day.” Nick said continuing to mindlessly run his fingers through Zak’s hair. “What do you want to do today?  
“It’s pretty nice out. We could go to the pool?” Zak suggested.  
“What, so I can watch you oil yourself all day and not be able to touch you? Hard pass.” Nick replied without hesitation.   
“Hmmm...we could go see a movie? Nice and dark. We could get a seat in the back row.” Zak tried.  
“I don’t know, there’s always that one creep that wants to watch everyone else instead of the movie. We don’t need pictures floating around. Why don’t we rent something and watch it here?”   
“Whatever.” Zak said, clearly frustrated.   
“Well, I’m open to other suggestions.” Nick replied.  
“Anything in public, or should I just name off indoor activities?” Zak answered sarcastically, sitting up.  
“Zak…”  
“I swear, I feel like you’re ashamed of me. You never want to take me anywhere. Do you know we’ve never even held hands in a public place?”   
“I’m not ashamed of you.” Nick said firmly. Zak let out a disgruntled huff. “It’s just hard for me.” Nick continued. “I haven’t told anyone about me yet, and I just get overwhelmed thinking about how to even start.” He reached a hand out to rest on Zak’s. “But it’s got nothing to do with how I feel about you.”   
“Look, I know it’s not easy.” Zak said, softening a bit. “I haven’t really told anyone about me either. But I’d like to. I want them to know about you and what you mean to me. I’m not saying we have to go public or anything. But it would be nice to at least tell Aaron and Billy. We spend so much time with them. It would be like a weight off our shoulders if they knew.”  
“I don’t know...I’ll think about it. Okay?” Nick offered hopefully.   
“Yeah, fine.” Zak said, giving up on the conversation for the moment. Nick offering to think about it is the closest they had gotten to an agreement on the subject and he didn’t want to waste the day fighting. “Ok, let’s stay in and rent something. But we are ordering food. Something with cheese fries.”   
Nick smiled gratefully. “Anything you want, babe.”


	2. Chapter 2

“Ugh…” Zak moaned. “Why did you let me eat so many fries?” He rubbed his stomach as he lay in Nick’s lap, the aftermath of their meal scattered on the coffee table in front of them.   
“No one forced you to eat all your fries and then finish mine.” Nick replied with a laugh.   
“You don’t just let cheese fries sit around, Nick. They don’t get better with time.” Zak said matter-of-factly.   
“Oh, I see. My mistake.” Nick smiled. “So, that movie was shit, wasn't it?”  
“The worst. So, so bad.” Zak laughed.   
“Yeah, sorry about that. You can pick the next one.” Nick said reaching down to run a hand through Zak’s hair.  
“Damn straight.” Zak said with a smirk. He tilted his head to lock eyes with Nick. Nick smiled back at him lovingly, just enjoying the quiet moment.   
“Are you happy?” Zak asked without thinking. He could tell Nick was taken aback by the question so he tried not to show the small pang of sadness he felt when Nick didn’t answer back immediately. But his eyes dropped for a moment and Nick didn’t miss it.   
“Hey.” Nick said, willing Zak to meet his eyes again. “You know I am. I’ve never been happier.” He grazed a hand down Zak’s cheek pulling a small smile from the older man. Zak sat up, turning to face Nick before pressing their lips together in a soft kiss. Nick wrapped his arms around Zak’s body, pulling him in protectively as he deepened the kiss. Zak was the first to pull away as he settled in next to Nick and laid his head on the younger man’s shoulder.   
“Good. Me too.” Zak said quietly.   
Nick’s heart sank. He meant what he said, he had never been happier. And he knew that Zak was happy too. But he also knew that by forcing them to keep their relationship quiet, he was denying Zak the true and complete happiness he craved. And he knew that Zak’s insecurities could easily convince him that Nick wanted to keep things quiet because he wasn’t sure about their relationship. He turned to kiss Zak’s forehead. A silent apology. He wished he could find a way to explain why it was so hard to think about coming out to people. He didn’t really even understand it himself. But it had nothing to do with Zak. Hell, Zak was the only thing he’s ever been sure about. And no matter what, Nick knew he belonged to him.   
“We should go out tonight.” Nick decided out loud.   
“Really?” Zak said sitting up in surprise. “Like you and me?”  
“Oh sorry, I meant me and my other boyfriend.” Nick joked. “Yeah, you and me.”   
“Okay!” Zak said with a smile. Nick half-expected a punch in the arm for the boyfriend joke but Zak was too excited to care. Nick couldn’t hold back his grin at how Zak’s face brightened from just the idea of going out.   
“Where should we go?” Nick asked, prepared to say yes to just about anything. He loved the look on Zak’s face and would do anything to keep it there.   
“Well, I don’t know if you want to or not…” Zak started with a hint of insecurity, “but I haven’t been to the casinos in a while.”  
“Oh…” Nick said thinking through the idea.  
“Unless you want to do something a little more quiet? Less public.” Zak cut in nervously. Afraid to say anything that would scare Nick into changing his mind.   
“No.” Nick answered firmly. “Let’s do it. I want to be out with you.”   
“Okay!” Zak said, his blue eyes glowing with excitement. “I better go get ready!” He leaned in for a quick kiss before jumping up to make his way toward the bathroom. Nick settled into the couch knowing he had at least 30 minutes before he had to start thinking about getting ready.   
\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
An hour and a half later they were finally leaving the house. Zak had changed his shirt at least five times, trying on different versions of what Nick was pretty sure was the same black shirt. But he had finally decided on one that hugged his arms and chest in just the right places. Nick knew it was going to be a herculean task to keep his hands to himself.   
“You look hot, babe.” he said when he noticed Zak looking down at himself, second guessing his choice.   
“Yeah?” Zak said with a satisfied smile, climbing into the passenger seat. “You look hot too. You’re wearing my favorite jeans.”  
“I know. You gonna watch me walk away?” Nick said mischievously, making a show of walking around the front of the car before sliding into the driver’s seat and looking at Zak expectantly.   
“You’re a dork.” Zak said with a laugh. “But you’ve got a great ass.”   
Nick smiled as he started the car, pulling out of the driveway and onto the street. He reached his free hand over to Zak’s, intertwining their fingers and pulling Zak’s hand to his mouth to softly kiss his knuckles before resting their hands together on the center console. Zak was used to Nick holding his hand in the privacy of their homes or hotel rooms, but this public display of affection was new to him and he loved it. He knew that there was almost no chance of anyone being able to see them in the car, especially since it was dark outside. But he didn’t care. This new side of Nick had him positively beaming. 

As they pulled up to the casino, Zak felt his heart jump into his throat. He had been waiting so long to go out in public with Nick. Not as his best friend or co-worker, but as his partner. And now that his wish had finally come true, he found his hands going clammy. He didn’t know how to act. It wasn’t like they were going public with their relationship so they still needed to be discreet. Zak’s heart began to race when Nick noticed his furrowed brow.   
“Hey. You ok?” He asked concerned. “You look a little...sweaty.”  
The last thing Zak wanted to do was give Nick a reason to second guess their plans, so he quickly rearranged his face into a semi-convincing smile. “I’m great. Just... excited.” he said deciding to just follow Nick’s lead.   
“Me too.” Nick said with a smile. He gave Zak’s hand a squeeze before letting go. 

As they made their way toward the casino bar, Zak felt like a 12 year old boy, unsure what to do with his hands. He felt awkward and he could tell that Nick noticed. Nick shot him a reassuring smile pressing his shoulder into Zak’s as they walked. The warmth radiated between them, calming Zak’s nerves a bit.   
“Do you want to get a table, or sit at the bar?” Nick asked.   
“Um, I don’t care. Whatever you want.” Zak replied, embarrassed with his awkward indecisiveness. It was unlike him to be so timid. “Actually, table!” He shouted quickly and a little louder than he meant to.   
“Table, it is.” Nick said, motioning for Zak to lead the way. The bar was crowded tonight and Zak began to worry that they might be recognized. He really didn’t want to spend the night posing for pictures and listening to stranger’s ghost stories. He squeezed through the large crowd, looking back to make sure he hadn’t lost Nick when he felt a familiar, warm hand wrap around his. He couldn’t help but grin back at the younger man as he gave his hand a squeeze. They spotted a table with two stools and made their way towards it, parting hands as they cleared the bulk of the crowd. Zak tried not to notice how empty his hand suddenly felt. Nick took a seat on one side of the table, as Zak climbed onto the stool opposite him.   
“You gonna sit all the way over there?” Nick asked with a sly grin.   
“Oh, um…” Zak started.  
Nick hopped off his stool, making his way toward Zak. He grabbed the leg of his stool, pulling it, and him, around the table. He climbed back onto his own stool giving Zak a grin. They were close enough that their knees touched and Zak’s heart fluttered in his chest like a damn school girl.   
“That’s better.” Nick said. “How am I supposed to touch you when you’re all the way over there?”   
Zak’s face flushed slightly. Nick was cool as a fucking cucumber and Zak felt like a sweaty, nervous mess. “I need a drink.” he said.   
“How about a beer?”   
“How about a whiskey.” Zak replied.   
Nick couldn’t help but smile at Zak’s nervousness. He was used to a confident Zak that knew what he wanted and wouldn’t stop until he got it. He rarely saw this side of his partner, but something about it was absolutely adorable. He leaned in a bit, resting his hand discreetly on Zak’s thigh. “It’s just me, babe. Relax.”  
“I know.” Zak huffed. “ I don’t know what wrong with me.” He laughed a little at how ridiculous he was being.   
“How about we get you that whiskey?” Nick said, lifting the hand on Zak’s leg to flag down a waitress. He ordered a whiskey and beer for each of them. Zak drained his whiskey immediately, feeling the warmth crawl down his throat and into his stomach.   
“Better?” Nick asked.   
“Yeah.” Zak smiled back. “Thanks for doing this, Nick.”   
Nick smiled, placing a hand on Zak’s kneecap. He had to fight his body’s instinct to lean in. He lowered his voice to a husky whisper. “God, I want to kiss you so bad right now.” Zak’s face flushed with embarrassment as Nick’s hand traveled slowly up his leg. The waitress walked up, startling them both. Nick’s hand flew off of Zak’s leg, hitting the underside of the table hard.   
“Shit.” Nick said surprised by the pain.   
“Can I get you boys another whiskey?” she said, unaware of what she had missed over the loud music.  
“Yeah, that would be great. And two more beers.” Zak said quickly. As she walked away, Zak couldn’t help but let the laugh he had been holding in go. “How’s your hand?” he said with a smile.  
“Hurts like hell.” Nick laughed back. “She came out of nowhere.”   
“She’s a ninja!” Zak joked.   
“Oh well, it’s probably for the best. With where my hand was headed, I’m not sure I could have stopped.” Nick said with a sly smile and Zak felt a stirring in his groin.   
The waitress reappeared with their drinks. Nick shot her a smile that she returned a little too eagerly for Zak’s taste.   
“Let me know when I can get you boys some more drinks.” she said before turning to Nick, “Or anything else you may want.” She lingered for a moment before walking away. And Zak did not miss the quick look she gave Nick over her shoulder. He shot an icy look at Nick, whose face was a deep shade of pink.   
“What the fuck was that?” Zak demanded.   
“What?” Nick said with a laugh, trying to calm the tension he felt brewing.  
“Are you kidding me? She practically eye fucked you.” Zak spat back.  
“Come on, Zak.” Nick said in a calm voice.  
“Come on, what? I’m supposed to just sit here and watch our waitress throw herself at you?”  
“Girls throw themselves at you all the time!” Nick said feeling the familiar twinge of jealousy even just thinking about it.   
“Yeah, but not when we’re on a date. That’s different.” Zak said earnestly.   
“How is it different?” Nick said confused.  
“When we’re with the guys and girls come up to us, that’s one thing. I mean, there’s a group of us and it’s not like the guys know about you and me. But when it’s just the two of us and we’re on a date and some girl tries to... get all up on you…” Zak trailed off with a huff.   
“Get all up on me?” Nick laughed incredulously.   
“Be serious, Nick” Zak said with another icy stare. Nick wiped the smile from his face, taking a deep breath.   
“Ok, you’re right. I’m sorry for laughing. But I feel like you’re being a little unreasonable. I didn’t make any advances, or flirt or do anything that would lead her to believe I was interested.” He reached under the table, grazing Zak’s hand with his own. “Because I’m not.”   
Zak exhaled, closing his eyes as the tension fell from his shoulders. “I know…” he said softly. “I’m sorry. I’m just jealous that she gets to flirt with you so publicly and I just have to sit here and watch.”   
“You want me to tell her?” Nick said, raising a hand to flag her, “Because I’ll call her over here right now if you want me to…” Zak grabbed his hand out of the air before the waitress could notice him. “I’ll tell her all the gory details… Waitress!” Nick called out. He knew there was no chance of it being heard over the thumping music, but it put that big, beautiful grin back on Zak’s face.   
“Nick, stop!” Zak said laughing. “You can’t tell the waitress before we tell the guys.”   
“Fair enough.” Nick said with a smile. He knew he was going to have to face his fear of coming out sooner or later. But lately, it was feeling like it was more sooner than later. He could tell that Zak was growing more impatient by the day, and he honestly couldn’t blame him. But he still worried about the possible repercussions. He looked at the man he loved, swallowing the lump of fear in his throat with the last of his whiskey.


	3. Chapter 3

Nick knew they’d had too much to drink. He could see it in Zak’s eyes, they way they looked almost wild as he told Nick a story about...something. He knew he should really be listening, but he was fixated by the ocean blue eyes staring into his. His eyes traveled down Zak’s face to his lips. His perfect, pink lips. He loved the way they curled up when Zak talked. How he licked them lightly every couple of minutes…  
“Nick!” Zak yelled, waving his hands in front of his face.   
“Sorry, what?” Nick said snapping back to attention.   
“I said, do you want another beer?” Zak started “But I think I might be boring you into a coma.”  
“No, you’re not. Sorry. I was just thinking.” Nick said.  
“Thinking about what?” Zak said with the goofy smile he got on his face when he was drunk. Nick couldn’t help but return the same smile.   
“Thinking about you. Thinking about that mouth and what I’d like to do to it right now.” Nick said, too drunk to care if he was yelling or not. Zak’s face and neck flushed but he leaned in slightly, licking his lips as he brought them just a little bit closer to Nick’s.   
“You mean this mouth?” he said raising an eyebrow. He knew what he was doing and it was working. Nick swallowed thickly, leaning in just a little bit closer, his chest rising and falling as his breath grew heavier.  
“I swear, if we were alone right now…” Nick whispered darkly.   
“What would you do? Tell me, Nick. What would you want to do to my mouth?” Zak said, sliding a hand up Nick’s thigh and leaning in closer. “Kiss it? Bite it?...Fuck it?”   
Nick let out a little growl, holding on to the tabletop to restrain himself. He’d had too much to drink and he was in danger of bending Zak over and going public right there on the table.  
“Zak…” He breathed a warning.   
“Yes, Nick?” Zak said with a sly smile, lightly pawing over the bulge in Nick’s pants. Nick’s breath caught in his throat.   
“Home. Now.” Nick growled unable to stop his hips from rising to Zak’s touch. Zak smiled, satisfied with his accomplishment.  
“You call a cab and _I’ll_ go settle our tab.” He couldn’t help giving Nick a little squeeze. Nick let out a surprised moan. “It’s your turn to watch me walk away.” Zak said as he hopped off the stool. It wasn’t until his feet hit the ground that he realized how drunk he was. He lost his balance, but quickly regained it, grabbing onto the tabletop. Nick noticed but he didn’t laugh. No need to kill the mood. Besides, he wanted to watch Zak walk away. As Zak made his way toward the bar, he glanced over his shoulder at Nick the way the waitress had earlier and was pleased to find his eyes still glued. He smiled and then motioned for Nick to call a cab already. 

Zak had hoped their waitress would be busy and someone else could close out their tab, but there she was. She was pretty. Just the type of girl that Zak would take home for the night if he wasn’t already spoken for. No doubt, she was Nick’s type too. He couldn’t help but scowl as he approached the bar.   
“Can I get you another whiskey?” she asked as he approached.   
“No, I just wanted to settle up.” Zak said more coldly than he intended. Thankfully, the waitress didn’t seem to notice his tone.  
“Oh, are you taking off?” she asked brightly.  
“Yep. It’s about that time.” Zak said trying hard to sound a little nicer.   
“Ok, let’s see… so, did you want separate checks, or...?” Zak did not miss her glance hopefully over his shoulder in Nick’s direction. His scowl returned.   
“Together.” He spat.   
“Oh.” She said, clearly disappointed. Zak couldn’t help but smile at her disappointment. He knew what an asshole that made him, but he was too damn drunk to care.   
“You have a lovely evening.” He said sarcastically, as he signed the receipt and turned back toward the table. He stopped dead in his tracks when he saw two familiar people had joined Nick at their table. As he walked toward the group, he couldn’t help but feel disappointed. They had been so close to successfully pulling off their first real date. He took a deep breath and plastered on a smile worthy of his friends. “What the hell are you guys doing here?”  
“I could ask you the same question, bro.” Aaron beamed back. “I can’t believe you fuckers hit the strip without us!”   
Zak shifted his glance to Nick who gave him a quick apologetic look. He couldn’t help but laugh at how Nick had positioned himself to hide his erection under the table.   
“Sorry, dude. It was a last minute thing.” Zak said, giving Aaron a squeeze on the shoulder and Billy a quick fist bump.  
“Yeah and I think we’re calling it a night anyway. This one’s had a few too many and I’m exhausted.” Nick said quickly. Zak shot him a quick glare at the implication that he was the only drunk one. But he was happy for any excuse that would get them home quickly.  
“No way, man! It’s early!” Aaron protested.   
“Yeah, come on. You guys can’t leave me alone with this guy. He always ditches me to dance with chicks.” Billy added.   
“Speaking of which,” Aaron cut in “where’s the crowd of women that usually gather around you two?”   
“Quiet night, man.” Nick said, standing up “Which is why I think we’re gonna…”  
“Nope! No way, man. Come on. We never hang out anymore.” Aaron protested, pushing Nick back into his stool and taking Zak’s seat next to him. Nick looked at Zak, defeated. Zak gave a weak smile knowing that there was really no way out of this. They’d have to stay for a drink or two before they could try and make their escape.   
Aaron raised his hand to flag a waitress “We need some drinks!” To Zak’s disappointment he caught the attention of the same waitress who practically lit up when she saw Nick at the table. As she made her way over, Zak felt his irritation rise.   
“Well, hello again.” she said, eyes focused on Nick. “Looks like you decided to stay after all.” Nick’s eyes darted around uncomfortably as blood started to rise in his cheeks. “Yeah, for a little while longer.”   
“Good.” She said with a sly smile. “Now what can I get you boys?”   
“Jameson all around!” Aaron chimed in, patting Nick on the back.   
“You got it.” she said with a quick wink as she turned to walk away.  
Aaron turned to Nick with a nod of surprise and approval. “Slow night, huh?”  
“Aaron…” Nick started, unsure of what to even say. Face growing redder by the second.  
“Look at him. He’s blushing.” Aaron joked. “It’s okay, bro. You don’t have to be embarrassed. It’s hard to perform in front of an audience.”  
Nick glanced in Zak’s direction hoping to give him a reassuring smile. But Zak stared at his hands, shoulders slumped in quiet defeat. The waitress returned with their drinks, placing them in front of Zak and Billy before circling around the table to place one in front of Aaron. She made her way around to stand close to Nick as she handed him his drink. Then, she slipped him a napkin that she had scribbled her name and number on. “I get off in an hour.” she said with a smile before walking away.   
“Daaaaaamn, dude. You gotta go after that.” Aaron said with a grin. “Tell me you’re gonna go after that.”  
Zak reached for his whiskey, draining it in one gulp. He could feel Nick’s eyes burning into him, but he couldn’t look up. He just studied the bottom of his empty glass, letting the burn of the whiskey coat his stomach.   
“Nah, man.” Nick said. “Not interested.”   
“What? Why not, dude?” Aaron said, confused.   
“Yeah, man. She’s hot.” Billy chimed in.   
Nick felt trapped and he desperately needed Zak to just look at him so that he could figure out what was going on in that head of his. But his eyes were glued to the bottom of his glass. Nick reached a foot out to brush Zak’s leg under the table. He saw Zak’s body go stiff when he felt the touch, but he only looked up long enough for Nick to see the disappointment in his eyes.   
“What do you think, G?” Aaron asked. And it took Zak a second to figure out that he was talking to him. “She’s hot, right?”  
“Yeah, she’s hot.” He wasn’t interested in pretending she wasn’t. And he was too worried about what he might say. “You gonna drink that?” He said, pointing to Nick’s untouched whiskey, eyes barely meeting his.   
Nick shook his head. “But I don’t know if you should have any more, bro.”  
Zak shot Nick a cold look as he grabbed for the glass. Nick only called him ‘dude’ and ‘bro’ in front of the guys and he hated it. He much preferred the things Nick called him when they were alone together.   
“I’m fine, _bro_.” he said dryly before draining Nick’s glass.   
“You okay, man?” Billy asked, looking concerned. Zak felt Nick’s whiskey in his legs. His vision was starting to blur and he could tell he was losing control.   
“I’m good, man!” He said with a slight slur and a friendly slap on Billy’s back. “Great. In fact, I think I’m gonna go dance.” He climbed off his stool, finding it infinitely harder to do this time. All the liquor he had in the past few hours had finally caught up with him and hit him like a truck.   
“Wait, I’ll come with you.” Nick said, jumping off his stool and stabling Zak with a hand on his elbow.   
“No thanks!” Zak said, pulling his arm away. “Why don’t you go talk to your girlfriend?” He knew how childish that sounded but he was drunk so he really didn’t care.   
“Zak…” Nick started, but Zak was already walking away. Short of chasing him down, throwing him over his shoulder and walking him out of the bar, Nick wasn’t sure what to do. He sat back down next to Aaron, exhaling sharply.   
“What’s up his ass?” Aaron asked.   
“I don’t know.” Nick lied. He wanted to follow Zak. He wanted to take him in his arms and remind him why that waitress had no chance. But he knew Zak was drunk and pissed and he had every right to be. It would be best to give him a little space. Hopefully, he would sober up a little so that they could talk somewhere.   
“Was he trying to get with that waitress or something?” Billy asked.  
“No. I think he just had too much to drink.” Nick lied again as he watched Zak make his way toward a group of ladies across the room.   
“Probably best to let him dance it off. Maybe he’ll get some. That always puts him in a better mood.” Aaron laughed.   
Nick resisted the urge to punch Aaron in the face. Jealousy spread over his entire body as he watched Zak. He had made short work of wriggling his way into the group of women. He watched, amazed as always, how quickly Zak could turn on the charm. Even piss-drunk, he had the ladies eating out of his hands. A tall brunette put an arm on Zak’s shoulder and whispered something in his ear. Nick felt his hands begin to shake and had to move them to his lap so Aaron and Billy wouldn’t notice.   
“Can you believe this guy?” Aaron laughed, pointing in Zak’s direction. “I swear, that’s an all time record.” Billy laughed and said something that Nick wasn’t listening to. He was in full-on possessive mode as he watched the brunette lead Zak to the dance floor. Soon their bodies were pressed tightly together as they moved to the music. Her hands began to roam up Zak’s arms and onto his chest. Nick balled his hands into fists and willed himself not to charge over there and show her who Zak belonged to. Soon Zak’s hands started to roam. He explored her waist and hips before making his way down to her butt to pull her in tight to his body as they ground against each other. Nick’s eyes burned into Zak, willing him to look over, but he kept his eyes focused on the woman in his arms. He was clearly enjoying himself which was the worst part. Nick’s jealousy slowly subsided as the feelings were replaced with a distinct ache in his chest.


	4. Chapter 4

Nick watched helplessly as the tall brunette ran her hands up the back of Zak’s neck and into his hair. He knew what was coming next, but he couldn’t look away. He watched as she pulled Zak’s face to hers, pressing their lips together. Zak stood frozen, arms releasing from her sides as he stood there and allowed himself to be kissed. Nick was out of his chair and halfway to Zak before his decision had even registered. He felt sad and betrayed and furious. It was a dangerous combination. Zak’s eyes popped open one second before Nick reached him as if he could feel the heat radiating off of his body. Nick reached out, tearing Zak away from the woman who protested at the interruption.  
“Back the fuck off!” Nick growled back at her. She shirked away at Nick’s tone but wasn’t giving up that easily.  
“Zak, come find me when you’re done with this…” she said pointing toward Nick.  
“Can’t you take a fucking hint?” Nick spat. He grabbed a fist-full of Zak’s shirt dragging him off the dance floor and over to a quiet corner of the bar, out of sight of Aaron and Billy.  
“Nick, I…” Zak started.  
“What the fuck, Zak?” Nick cut him off, releasing his shirt. He was still shaking from the adrenaline. “I can’t believe you would do that to me. I _never_ would have done that to you.”  
Zak could see the hurt in his eyes. He was beginning to sober up and the full weight of what had happened began to sink in. He was still mad about the waitress, but he also knew that his actions hadn’t helped the situation either. “Nick, please…” he said, reaching his arms to calm Nick’s trembling shoulders.  
“Don’t touch me!” He said angrily, taking a step back. Hurt flashed over Zak’s eyes and Nick couldn’t help but take a little satisfaction in it.  
“I shouldn’t have...Nick, I’m so sorry. She kissed me and I just froze. I was just so pissed about earlier and I lost my head.”  
“This isn’t just about the kiss, Zak. Can’t you see that? Nick felt heat rising off his body as he spoke. He took a step in toward Zak, voice dropping an octave in anger “You were the one who went over there looking for trouble. You danced with her, knowing that it would hurt me to watch. You did that.” He poked his index finger hard into Zak’s chest for emphasis. “So don’t give me that shit about losing your head. You knew exactly what you were doing.”  
“So you’re really gonna put this whole night on me?” Zak asked, bewildered. “I spent the entire evening watching that waitress drool all over you. Not to mention Aaron and Billy practically picking out your fucking china pattern. And all I’m thinking is, “He has to know how much this hurts me.” But I guess you don’t care enough to tell them the truth.”  
“Oh, I see. I’m not ready to tell them about us, so you thought you’d torture me a little bit? Make me watch while you rub yourself all over some random chick? Is that supposed to be payback?”  
“No.” Zak said offended by the accusation. “It’s not about Aaron and Billy, it’s about having to sit there like an asshole while she threw herself all over you, knowing there was nothing I could do about it.” He knew he wasn’t being entirely honest, he had hoped to make Nick jealous so that maybe, just maybe he could see why telling Aaron and Billy would make their lives so much easier. But he never intended for it to go as far as it had.  
“Zak, I can’t keep having this conversation. _She_ was coming on to _me_. I didn’t reciprocate. I didn’t touch her. And you know what? I sure as hell didn’t kiss her.” Nick said, turning to leave. He could feel the anger and jealousy taking over his body and he knew he had to get out before he said or did something that he would regret.  
“Nick, don’t walk away!” Zak shouted, grabbing a fist-full of his jacket.  
“Let me go, Zak. I’m done talking about this.” Nick said ripping himself free of his grip. But Zak was strong and quick and he grabbed at the crook of Nick’s arm, pulling him back.  
“You don’t get to call all the shots, Nick. This is supposed to be a partnership.”  
“Yeah, hell of a partner I’ve got, running to the first thing that breathes when he doesn’t get his way.” Nick said harshly.  
Hurt washed over Zak’s eyes as the words soaked in. “Fuck you, Nick.” He said, releasing his grip.  
“I’m outta here.” Nick said, reaching into his pocket and tossing the car keys at Zak. “You can figure out how to get yourself home. I’m sure your new friend would be happy to drive you if you haven’t sobered up enough.” He turned and walked out of the bar and into the warm summer night.  
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Nick pulled up to the GAC office the next morning. He would give anything to skip today’s meeting, but he couldn’t risk raising suspicions. He wasn’t ready to see Zak. He hadn’t slept. Instead he spent the entire night replaying their argument over and over in his head. Each time he became more and more upset. He was so pissed at Zak for trying to manipulate him. He was still jealous as hell of the woman who had her hands all over Zak. _His_ Zak. He closed his eyes, pushing out the image of her lips on his. He quickly pulled down the visor to check himself out. No need for Zak to know he hadn’t slept. But it was no use. The bags under his eyes were gigantic and he hadn’t bothered to fix his hair or shave. He looked like a mess. He could only hope Zak did too. He braced himself as he walked into the office. Turning the corner he found Billy and Aaron sitting on the couch looking over evidence from their previous investigation.  
“Morning” he said, throat still thick with the sleep he never got. He could tell by the way Aaron looked at him that he looked worse than he thought.  
“Dude...you look like shit.” Aaron said, charming as ever.  
“Thanks.” Nick said sarcastically.  
“What happened to you last night?” Billy asked. “You disappeared on us.”  
“I was just really tired...long day. So I headed home.” Nick said feeling relieved that they hadn’t witnessed the Zak and Nick show.  
“Oh, we thought maybe you met up with the waitress. What was her name again?” Aaron asked.  
“I don’t remember. But no.” Nick said quickly dismissing it. The last thing he needed was for Zak to overhear them and get all grumpy and weird. “Should we get started?” Nick said hoping to change the conversation.  
“We’d love to, but our fearless leader hasn’t arrived yet.” Billy said.  
“Zak’s not here?” Nick said. Zak was notoriously early for these meetings. He had left Nick at home on more than one occasion because he wasn’t getting ready fast enough.  
“Probably hung over.” Aaron interjected. “He was going strong after you left.”  
“Oh.” Nick was afraid to ask, but he had to know. “Did he leave alone?”  
“I’m not sure, he left after us.” Aaron said. “He was in kind of a weird mood though. Total buzzkill.”  
“Oh. So the dancing didn’t help?” Nick asked, desperate for more information but unwilling to ask outright.  
“I guess not.” Aaron said focusing his attention back on the computer. Nick cursed himself for asking a yes or no question. He needed to know if Zak went back to that woman after he left. But he couldn’t think of a way to ask that wasn’t completely obvious. He sighed, flopping himself on the couch.  
“Did anyone text him?” Billy and Aaron both shook their heads. Nick refused to be the first to text, but he was starting to get a little worried. “Billy, do you mind? Forgot to plug my phone in to charge last night. My battery is pretty low.”  
“Sure.” Billy said pulling his phone out and shooting off a quick text to Zak. They reviewed footage for another 15 minutes or so with no response from Zak. Now that he was over 30 minutes late, Nick was on pins and needles. He’d already confirmed twice with Billy that Zak hadn’t answered. He was worried. Where the fuck was he and why wasn’t he answering his phone?  
“Maybe we should just postpone?” Billy suggested. “We really need Zak here for this.”  
“Yeah.” Nick agreed. He was anxious to get out of there so he could swing past Zak’s place on the way home. He didn’t plan to go in, he just wanted to see what he could see. “Hey, Billy. Do me a favor and just text when you hear back from him?”  
“Sure, man.” Billy said.  
Nick said a quick goodbye and made his way out to the car. He was just going to drive past. Take a quick look to make sure Zak was home safe and preferably alone.  
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As he rounded the corner onto Zak’s block, he spotted it immediately. Zak’s car was in the driveway, the front right side smashed to hell. Nick’s heart jumped into his throat as he raced to pull into the driveway next to it. He fumbled for Zak’s house key on his ring and let himself in, heart beating a mile a minute.  
“Zak!” He yelled. His voice sounded shaky and desperate. His breath quickened as he listened for an answer. “Zak!” he yelled again, running upstairs to the bedroom. But Zak was nowhere to be found. He stormed down the stairs making his way toward the door to Zak’s dungeon. As he pounded down the stairs he was relieved to see a familiar silhouette laying on the couch. As he moved closer, he could make out the outline of Zak’s soundproof headphones. He breathed a shaky sigh of relief. Feeling himself being watched, Zak opened his eyes. He jumped out of his skin at the outline of Nick standing over him.  
“Fuck, Nick. Don’t you know how to knock?” He said angrily, tearing off his headphones and sitting up to take a drink of whiskey.  
“What the hell happened to your car? Zak, please tell me you didn’t drive home last night.”  
“Actually, I didn’t. Stacy drove. You remember her from last night, right? The warm body I “ran to when I wasn’t getting my way””. Zak said, drunkenly emphasizing the air quotes. Nick’s body tightened with jealousy. So he had brought her home.  
“I think you should switch to water.” Nick said, ignoring Zak’s insinuation and reaching over to grab the bottle of whiskey from the table.  
“Well, apparently, she wasn’t as sober as I thought. Smashed the damn car into a pole.” Zak said with a humorless laugh.  
“You know, before you let your girlfriends drive your car, you should really check to make sure they at least have their learner’s permit.” Nick said coldly. He was doing everything in his power to hide his feelings but he couldn’t stop his body from shaking as he thought of that woman kissing Zak, touching him and worst of all, endangering his life.  
“Aren’t you curious?” Zak asked, taking a drink from his glass.  
“About what?” Nick asked snapping out of his thoughts. He didn’t like the look on Zak’s face, and he worried about what was coming next.  
“About how she was.” Zak said darkly. Nick stood frozen. His hands balled so hard into fists that he worried he would shatter the bottle he held.  
“I just came to check on you.” Nick said, fighting to keep his voice even. “I’m glad you’re okay.” He turned to leave, feeling heat rush to his eyes.  
“Nick, wait…” Zak plead, voice breaking. But Nick ignored him and made his way out of the house and into his car when he felt the first tear drop.


	5. Chapter 5

Zak lost track of time as he lay in his dungeon. He hadn’t left the couch in God knows how long. Thanks to his windowless room, he didn’t know if it was day or night. He didn’t care either way. His head ached from dehydration. He hadn’t been able to stop crying since Nick left and the fluids he’d lost had been replaced with so much whiskey he wondered if it was possible to cry the stuff out. He soaked up the darkness around him, allowing it to take him over as he wallowed in his sadness. He had lost Nick. He knew by the look on his face as he had turned to leave that the damage was irreparable. He cursed himself for not following him, not making him stay so that they could talk everything out. He thought again about what he had said. It was cruel and immature, and he knew that, but in his mind he hoped that Nick would fight for him or at the very least, stay and yell at him. He just wanted him to show some kind of emotion, some commitment to their relationship. But he had just turned and walked out. It was at that moment that the light went off in Zak’s head. He finally accepted why Nick wanted to hide their relationship. On some level, he’d known all along. He tried to push it to the back of his mind, but it was always there, nagging him. Nick was falling out of love with him. Or maybe he already had. He remembered back when they first got together, how they’d talk into the night. Dream about what their future together held. How they’d wait until the right time and then tell the world about their love. But time passed and Nick kept making excuses. Zak tried not to be too pushy, but every time Nick turned him down it broke his heart just a little bit more. He loved Nick, he really did. He’d never really loved anyone before and he had no idea how much it could hurt. And even now he’d still take a secret relationship over no relationship, as pathetic as that sounded. But he was sure that he’d lost that now. He’d finally pushed the relationship to the edge, and over a damn cliff. And he had no one to blame but himself.   
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Nick’s phone vibrated against the table, pulling him from a half-asleep state. He grabbed for the phone, hoping to see Zak’s name on the screen. But it was just another message from Billy. It had been two days, and no word from Zak. He unlocked his phone to read the message. 

_Dude, where have you been? I need to talk to you. Don’t make me send someone out to do a wellness check._

Nick gave a small smile. He knew he had better answer. Billy had already texted him three times in the past two days, probably worried about getting their next meeting on the books. 

_Sorry, I’ve been caught up in some stuff. Can we talk later? I know we need to set a day for our next meeting. I’ll let you know ASAP._

He sent it off hoping that would calm Billy down a bit for the next couple of days. He wasn’t ready to be in the same room as Zak. His chest ached just thinking about it. Yet he couldn’t stop checking his phone to see if the man had texted him. After he had left Zak’s the other day, he stayed up all night, half-expecting him to show up drunk on his doorstep. But he didn’t, and Nick couldn’t help but wonder what he was doing instead. He started to worry that maybe Zak had gotten a taste of something he liked better. Nick couldn’t help but think about the way Zak taunted him about sleeping with that woman. Stacy... He cringed, shaking his head to try and clear his mind when his phone buzzed again. He reached for it, grabbing it before the first vibration could even finish. Billy again. 

_I hope I’m not out of line, but is there something going on between you and Zak?_

Nick stared at his phone, unsure of how to answer. He wasn’t sure if Billy put two and two together that they were in a fight, or if he was asking if they were in a relationship. He saw the ellipsis dance on his screen, indicating that Billy was typing again. Soon another message came through. 

_I’m sorry. You don’t have to answer that. I’m just really worried about Zak._

Nick’s fingers sprang into motion at the mention of Zak. 

_Why? What’s wrong with him?_

He held his breath as Billy typed for what seemed like an eternity. Nick worried that maybe the car accident had been worse than he thought. Maybe Zak had been injured but was too drunk to realize he needed to go to the hospital. He cursed himself for not just calling Billy instead of waiting for him to compose a novel. He clicked on his contacts list and got to Billy’s name as his next text came through. 

_I’m not sure, man. He called me late last night in rough shape. He asked me if I could come by. I thought maybe he was drunk or having a problem with an attachment or something. But when I got there he was having a really hard time. He was crying on and off and it looked like he hadn’t slept in days. He wouldn’t tell me what was wrong, just wanted someone to sit with him for a while._

Nick’s heart broke as he re-read Billy’s message. Guilt washed over his body. Regardless of their fight, he wished he could have been there for Zak. Nick felt overwhelmingly grateful for Billy in that moment. He typed a quick message as he slipped into his shoes.

_Thank you for being there for him, Billy._

He reached for his keys as he felt his phone vibrate again. Looking down, he saw another message from Billy.

_It should have been you._

Another wave of guilt hit him as he keyed in his response. 

_I know._

He closed the door, locking it behind him before jumping into his car and racing out of the driveway.   
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Nick walked up to the door, unsure of what to do. The key he’d used hundreds of times sat in his hand, but now it felt wrong to use it. He shifted nervously on his feet before ringing the doorbell. He heard Gracie bark as she ran toward the door. Soon after, he heard the sound of feet shuffling toward him. The door opened to reveal Zak, standing in his sweats, hair disheveled. A look of surprise washed over his face. Nick couldn’t help but notice his puffy, tired eyes. Clearly he hadn’t gotten much sleep since Billy had been over. 

“Nick…” he said quietly, afraid that if he talked too loud it would snap him from whatever dream he was in.   
“Hey.” Nick said back with a small smile. They lingered in silence for a moment, Zak unable to take his eyes off of Nick’s. “Can I come in?”   
“Yeah, of course.” Zak answered quickly, stepping back to let him by. “You know, you could have let yourself in. You didn’t have to ring the doorbell.”   
“I wasn’t sure if…” Nick trailed off. He wasn’t sure if Zak was alone or if he even wanted to see him at all. He just knew that if Zak was hurting, he needed to be there for him.   
“So, I’m guessing you talked to Billy.” Zak said. It wasn’t a question. He could tell Billy was worried about him. He’d made him promise not to say anything to Nick or Aaron, but he assumed that went out the window pretty quickly.   
“Yeah, he texted me.” Nick’s heart sank with guilt as he remembered Billy’s text to him.   
“I didn’t tell him anything, I swear. I just...I just needed someone.” Zak said, clearing his throat to hide the way it caught. “And I knew he wouldn’t push me with questions.”   
“That’s okay, Zak.” Nick said taking a step toward him and placing a hand lightly on his arm. Zak released a shaky breath. The warmth of Nick’s hand radiated over his entire body. He honestly worried he’d never feel that touch again.   
“Nick…” he managed, voice breaking again. He didn’t try to hide it this time as his eyes welled up with tears. “Nick, please. I’m so sorry.” Nick reached out to touch Zak’s other arm rubbing his hands up and down the older man’s arms to calm him.  
“Hey, hey, hey. It’s okay.” Nick said bringing his eyes to meet Zak’s. “We don’t have to talk about that right now. I didn’t come here to talk about that. I just wanted to make sure you were okay.” Zak nodded his head, working to collect himself.   
“Will you stay?” Zak asked a bit more desperately than he meant to. “For a little while at least? he added quickly. Nick hesitated for a moment, but he knew he couldn’t say no when Zak looked at him so hopefully.   
“Sure. For a little while.” He said. He followed Zak into the living room. He sat on the couch and looked up at Nick with a small smile. But Nick could see the nervousness hiding behind it. And he couldn’t help but feel the butterflies in his own stomach as well. He sat down on the couch, leaving a bit more room between them than he normally would. They sat in silence. Neither one sure of what to say. Finally, Zak cleared his throat before speaking quickly.  
“I know I fucked up, Nick.” He said. “And I know you said you didn’t want to talk about it. I just --”   
“Zak.” Nick said, cutting him off.   
“I didn’t sleep with her.” Zak said. He felt the impact of his words immediately. He didn’t know what was worse, actually cheating on Nick or pretending he did. But he knew he needed to be honest. Nick’s body froze as he digested the words. He waited for the relief to wash over him, but all he could feel was anger and confusion.   
“You...what? Nick said, running his hand through his hair as he processed this new information. “Why, Zak? Why would you lie to me about that?”  
“I know how wrong it was to do. How selfish…and I won’t make excuses for myself. I was testing you. I finally started putting it all together. I mean, all the signs had been there, but something about that night...everything just sort of clicked. And I realized. I figured out why you never wanted to tell anyone about us.” He shifted uncomfortably in his seat. “ I know your feelings for me have changed.” Zak’s voice broke, but he pushed on, needing to get the whole truth out in the open. “But I thought maybe if I made you jealous enough, I could still get you to fight for us. And that maybe you could love me again.” Zak’s face burned red with shame and sadness. He looked down at his hands not wanting to see the confirmation in Nick’s eyes. He felt a warm hand rest on his cheek and he closed his eyes to stop the tears that were threatening to overflow. Nick pulled Zak’s face to his, kissing both of his eyelids where tears had begun to form before slowly pressing their lips together for a soft kiss. Zak breathed into the kiss as tenseness left his body. Their tongues tangled as the kiss deepened, only breaking apart as the need for oxygen presented itself. Zak opened his eyes, surprise clear on his face. He had not been expecting a kiss after that confession. But as he looked at Nick, he noticed the younger man’s eyes glossy with tears. He reached a hand to Nick’s face, confused but wanting to comfort him.  
“Nick, what is it?” He asked worriedly.   
“I hate myself for making you feel that way.” Nick said, still trying to catch his breath. “I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I love you so much...I was hurt and angry and I said some things... but I could never stop loving you.” He said, grabbing Zak’s hand. “Please don’t give up on me, Zak. I can do this.” he plead. This time it was Zak’s turn to press their lips together. He kissed Nick more desperately, pulling him close. He wanted to feel the man he thought he had lost forever. Even as they broke their kiss, he held Nick tight, burying his face in his partner’s neck.   
“I thought I lost you.” Zak said, breathing in the familiar warmth of Nick’s skin.   
“Never.” Nick breathed, placing a kiss on Zak’s head. He felt Zak smile against his neck as his body relaxed into Nick’s. They sat holding each other quietly, their breath evening out as they both started to give in to exhaustion. Feeling his eyelids growing heavy, Nick rearranged himself to lay on the couch, pulling Zak to rest on his chest. The movement caused Zak to stir.   
“Stay, Nick. Please.” He said with a hint of panic in his voice.   
“I’m not going anywhere, babe.” He said pulling the man back down to lay on him. Zak nuzzled into Nick’s chest, taking a deep breath and giving in to his need for sleep again.   
“I can do it now, Nick.” He whispered sleepily. “I can keep it a secret. As long as you want. I promise.” Nick ran his fingers through Zak’s hair, shushing him to sleep.   
_Nope._ He thought, _This would not do._


	6. Chapter 6

Zak’s eyes opened slowly. He was still exhausted but he was cold. Instinctively, he reached out looking for his favorite heat source but he was nowhere to be found. He sat up, confused. It took him a minute to realize he was on the couch. But once he did, he began to remember what had happened the night before. Or at least, he thought it did. But where was Nick? Panic set in at the possibility that it had all been a very vivid dream. “Nick!” he yelled desperately, holding his breath.  
“In the kitchen!” Nick called back. Relief washed over Zak as he exhaled. He grabbed a throw from the end of the couch, wrapping it around his shoulders before making his way into the kitchen.   
“Morning, stud.” Nick grinned. He flipped a pancake before making his way over to Zak. “You cold?” he asked rubbing his hands up and down Zak’s arms. Zak didn’t answer, he just stared into Nick’s brown eyes as he let his heart rate slow. “Zak?” Nick said, a look of concern growing on his face. Zak wrapped his arms and the throw around Nick, pulling him in and holding him tight.   
“I woke up, and you weren’t there.” Zak said, hoping it would explain his strange behavior. “I thought…” Nick tightened his grip on his partner.  
“I’m sorry, babe.” he said running his hands along Zak’s back to calm him. Zak closed his eyes relaxing into Nick before pulling away to look him in the eye.   
“That’s okay.” he said with a smile. “I’m just glad it wasn’t a dream.” Nick leaned in, pressing his lips to Zak’s for a soft, warm kiss.   
“Definitely not a dream.” he said smiling. “I hope you’re hungry.” he said, playfully smacking Zak on the ass before making his way over to the stove to tend to the now over-cooked pancake. Zak took a look at the full breakfast spread and wondered how long Nick had been awake.   
“Is there anything left in the fridge?” he laughed. Nick rolled his eyes, adding the stack of pancakes to the spread. Zak pulled up a stool, mouth watering. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d eaten and the smell of the bacon was intoxicating. “I’m starving.” He said, grabbing a plate and loading it up.   
“I thought you might be.” Nick said, joining Zak at the counter and filling his own plate.   
“How long have you been up?” Zak asked, shoving a forkful of eggs into his mouth.   
“A while…” Nick said.   
“You should have woken me up.” Zak said, brushing his knee against Nicks. Needing to maintain contact with him. “It would have been nice to wake up with you.”  
“I thought about it, but you were really out. I mean, snoring, drooling…” Nick said with a grin. Zak shot him a disapproving look.   
“I was not drooling.” He said with a huff.   
“Tell that to my shirt.” Nick said with a laugh. Zak noticed a pretty large stain on the front of Nick’s shirt. He would have assumed it was a cooking-related stain, but he knew better. His face reddened slightly.   
“Sorry about that.” He laughed. “I was so exhausted... I still am, actually.”  
“Well, finish up and let’s go take a nap.” Nick said, running his hand up Zak’s thigh, sending shivers down his back. Zak looked into Nick’s dark, lust-filled eyes and dropped his fork, attacking his lips.   
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“That was some nap.” Zak said, chest heaving as they lay side-by-side in bed regaining their breath.   
“Best nap of my life.” Nick said with a smile, wrapping his arms around Zak and pulling him to lay halfway on top of him. He pressed their lips together in a soft kiss. “I love you, Zak.” he said, lips grazing softly.   
“I love you too.” Zak replied touching his forehead to Nick’s and closing his eyes. “So much.” He breathed in Nick’s warmth before nestling his head in the crook of his neck. “I could stay like this all day.”   
“Me too.” Nick breathed. “Too bad we can’t.” He continued, a mischievous grin forming on his lips.  
“And why not?” Zak said, recognizing the tone of Nick’s voice. It always made him nervous to hear Nick talk that way. But he had to admit it excited him too.   
“Because we have plans tonight.” he said definitively. Zak raised his eyes to meet Nick’s giving him a suspicious look.   
“Is that so?” Zak started, “And what are we doing?”  
“I am taking you on a date.” Nick said as he rolled out from under Zak.   
“Hey…” Zak pouting at having lost his warm, human pillow. “Where are you going?”  
“I gotta go home and get ready.” Nick said, collecting his scattered clothes from the floor piece by piece.   
“Get ready here.” Zak insisted.   
“I need to shave and I gotta get something to wear.” Nick said, stepping into his jeans and zipping them up.  
“I have clothes, borrow something of mine.” Zak said, voice growing slightly desperate.   
“I love you, Zak, but your shirts are too damn tight.” he looked up at Zak who was now making a show of pouting. He walked over to the bed to sit next to him, grabbing his chin, he pulled it up to lock eyes with him. “I’m coming back. I won’t be gone long, I promise.”   
“Ok.” Zak relented. “Are you at least gonna to tell me where we’re going?”   
“Nope.” Nick said with a grin and a quick kiss.  
“But how am I supposed to know what to wear?” Zak asked as Nick threw on his shirt.   
“Whatever you wear will be fine.” Nick said walking toward the bedroom door. “I’ll be back by 8. Be ready!” Zak followed behind, frustrated with the lack of information he was being given.   
“If you don’t give me a hint, I’m just going to wear one of my tight shirts!” He snarked.   
“Fine by me.” Nick yelled back as he opened the front door. “8 o’clock Zak! Be ready!”   
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Zak swore as he stubbed his toe. It was 7:59 and he was scrambling around the room trying to clean up. He had tried on every shirt he owned but he did not need Nick to know that. He had finally settled on a classic black military-style button up and his glasses. Nick loved when he wore glasses. He would make endless sexy librarian jokes that Zak pretended to hate. He jumped as the front door shut.   
“Zak?” Nick called up the stairs.  
“Coming!” Zak called back, cursing under his breath as a shoved the last of the mess into a nearby hamper. He checked his hair before making his way down the stairs. Nick smiled at him from the bottom of the stairs. Zak’s heart fluttered in his chest as he took in the sight. “You sure do clean up good, Groff.” Nick’s face colored slightly at the compliment. He wrapped his arms around Zak, pulling him in close.   
“You know, if librarians had looked like you when I was a kid, I would have spent a lot more time reading.” Nick purred. Zak made a show of rolling his eyes before pressing their lips together.  
“So where are we going?” Zak asked again batting his lashes.  
“That’s not gonna work, Zak.” Nick smiled. Zak leaned in kissing Nick long and deep this time. He ran his hands down his back, sending shivers up Nick’s spine. He broke the kiss looking back up at Nick expectantly.   
“Did that work then?” he asked, satisfied with the lust-drunk look on Nick’s face.   
“Well, that depends on what you were hoping to achieve.” Nick said, guiding Zak’s hand down to his growing bulge.   
“Oh my…” Zak said raising his eyebrows and giving a light squeeze. Nick’s breath hitched in his throat. Zak couldn’t help but chuckle. He had Nick right where he wanted him. “Where are we going?” He whispered in Nick’s ear while continuing to lightly paw at him.   
“Not...gonna...work...Zak.” Nick managed. Zak grinned, planting a quick kiss on Nick’s lips before dropping to his knees. As he reached for Nick’s zipper, he heard his phone ring.   
“Shit.” Nick said, clearly disappointed.   
“Let it go to voicemail.” Zak replied, still working to free Nick’s trapped hard-on.   
“I can’t, it’s probably the cab driver.” Nick said, digging for his phone and answering. “Hello? Yeah, how close are you? Oh, you are? Okay, we’ll be right out.” He hung up the phone, head dropping in disappointment. “Come on, babe. We gotta go, he’s outside.”   
“Let him wait for a couple minutes.”   
“No, we’re already running late. We’re gonna lose our reservations.” Nick said, stepping back to tuck himself back into his pants. Zak jumped up, excitedly.   
“Ah ha! I knew it. We _are_ going to dinner.” He said with a triumphant smile.   
“You don’t know anything.” Nick said, clearly frustrated with his own slip up. “Of course we’re going to dinner. All dates start with dinner!”  
“Um...lunch dates, coffee dates, meeting for drinks…” Zak retorted, smiling in satisfaction.   
“Whatever! Fine. We’re going to dinner. Are you happy?” Nick said in mock frustration.   
“I won.” Zak said with a grin. “Of course I’m happy.” He leaned in for a quick kiss. Nick reached out to grab his hand walking him toward the door. As Nick opened it, Zak instinctively moved to drop his hand before the cab driver could see, but Nick held on, giving him a light squeeze. Zak locked eyes with Nick who gave him a reassuring nod. “Well, okay then.” He said with a smile.


	7. Chapter 7

“Is something wrong with your dinner?” Nick asked snapping Zak back to reality.   
“What? Oh...no. It’s delicious.” Zak said with a grin, picking up his fork and knife to cut himself another bite of steak. He’d been smiling since he realized where they were going. He knew he looked like an idiot, but he didn’t care. He was happy.   
“You know, when I take someone out on a date, I usually like to talk to them. But if you want some alone time with that steak…” Nick joked.  
“I’m sorry. I was just thinking about the first time we came here.” Zak said, giving Nick his full attention.   
“Yeah, I was nervous as hell.” Nick said, remembering the butterflies he had felt sitting across from Zak. At that point, he didn’t understand what they meant. He only knew that he wanted to be around him. He needed to be.   
“I know.” Zak said with smile. “I remember, I was so happy you had called me up to hang out. I was starting to wonder if I was ever going to hear from you again. It had been days since we met and I was worried that I came on a little strong.”   
“You did.” Nick laughed. “Which is exactly why I couldn’t get you out of my mind.” Zak smiled, nudging his foot against Nick’s under the table. Nick reached across the table, taking Zak’s hand.   
“Nick?” Zak said, looking around, surprised. But Nick didn’t acknowledge it, he just looked into Zak’s eyes as he continued.   
“When I called you, I remember I was so confused. I couldn’t figure out how to make plans with you without feeling like I was asking you on a date. It was a long time before I realized that I was. I spent so long denying what I knew from the beginning. You’re special. You’re different from anyone else I’ve ever met. And being around you...it makes me the best and happiest version of myself. I just wish someone had told me that that’s what love feels like. Maybe then I wouldn’t have spent so long screwing it up.”   
“Nick…” Zak said, eyes welling up. “You haven’t screwed up anything.”  
“I made you doubt my feelings for you.” Nick said solemnly. “That’s a mistake I don’t plan on repeating.” Zak smiled, a tear running down his cheek. Nick squeezed his hand lightly before letting go and returning to his own steak.   
“You’re amazing, Nick.” Zak said, locking eyes with the younger man across the table. “Now finish that steak because I have plans for you when we get home.” He said lowering his voice an octave. Nick felt an unmistakable twitch in his groin at the promise.   
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Nick checked his phone again as they walked out of the restaurant. Zak couldn’t help but notice how many times he’d checked it since dessert. “Everything okay?” he asked casually.   
“Yeah, sorry. I’m just late for a date with my other boyfriend.” Nick joked without missing a beat. “Jerk.” Zak laughed, punching him in the arm playfully. Nick caught his arm pulling him into his side as they walked. “Should we grab this cab?” Zak asked nodding toward an approaching car.   
“Nah.” Nick said, “It’s such a nice night. Let’s go for a walk on the strip.”   
“Really?” Zak asked surprised, “Okay.” They walked in comfortable silence, admiring the lights as the approached the strip. Nick couldn’t help but notice how Zak never stopped smiling. He felt his heart swell with love for the man he’d almost lost. “What?” Zak said out of the blue, looking over to make eye contact.   
“What?” Nick asked confused.  
“You’re staring at me.” Zak said matter-of-factly, smile never leaving his face.   
“Sorry” Nick chuckled, “Just happy.” Zak’s smile grew impossibly wider, creasing at the corners of his eyes.   
The closer the strip got, the drunker the crowd. Zak loved a lot of things about Vegas, but piss-drunk fans invading his personal space was not one of those things. It had become something of a regular thing whenever he found himself on the strip. Instinctively, he put a little space between himself and Nick. “We need to be careful around here.” Zak explained when Nick looked at him questioningly. “I just don’t want to deal with strangers asking questions right now.”   
“Got it.” Nick said, understanding. “Here, follow me.” He continued, taking Zak by the arm and navigating the swarms of people easily. Before he knew it, they were at the entrance of the club they had gone to the other night. Zak pulled back as Nick guided him toward the entrance.   
“Nick…” Zak said shaking his head.   
“What?” Nick asked. “Let’s get a drink.”   
“I don’t want to go in there.” Zak said, crossing his arms. Nick’s shoulders slumped slightly as he took a step toward Zak.   
“Come on, babe. I hate what happened the other night. And I don’t want to think about it either. But we’ve had good times here too, right?” He said, cocking his eyebrows. Zak gave a small smile, nodding his head in agreement. “So, let’s make some more good memories.” Nick said with a grin. Zak gave in, rolling his eyes slightly as his smile widened. He followed Nick into the club. They maneuvered through the crowd, making their way to the bar.   
“There’s a table over there.” Zak said pointing out an empty booth. Nick continued to scan the bar distractedly.   
“Oh...um...let’s see what’s on the other side.” Nick said, leading the way. As they rounded the corner, Zak immediately zeroed in on two familiar faces.   
“Shit.” He said. It’s not that he wasn’t happy to see them, he was. It’s just that this was a little too similar to how things had played out earlier that week. Something he did not want to repeat. He grabbed Nick’s arm, leaning in to shout over the loud music. “Aaron and Billy are here. I don’t think they saw us though.” He said, pulling Nick back into the cover of the crowd.   
“Good. I invited them.” Nick said with a satisfied smile before turning and making his way toward the table. Zak stood confused for a moment before rushing to catch up with him.  
“You could have mentioned it!” Zak shouted over the music.   
“Where’s the fun in that?” Nick called back over his shoulder. He walked up to the table grinning from ear to ear. “Gentlemen, you made it.” He squeezed Aaron’s shoulders before taking a stool across from him.   
“Of course, bro. It feels like forever since I saw you guys.” Aaron said patting Zak on the back as he made his way around the table to take the seat next to Nick. “Where you been?”   
“Oh, you know. Busy with stuff.” Nick said nonchalantly, “It’s always something, right?”   
“Ain’t that the truth.” Aaron said, taking a sip of his drink. “What about you, what have you been up to?” Aaron asked, looking at Zak. Zak shrugged, searching for a good excuse but he was coming up blank.   
“He’s been sending me all kinds of EVPs and stuff from old investigations. Driving me nuts.” Billy said, coming to the rescue. Zak gave him a grateful smile for the help.   
“Obsessing again? Aaron teased.   
“You know me!” Zak said with a laugh.   
“You’re a good sport, Billy.” Nick said with a meaningful smile. Hoping to convey how thankful he was for Billy’s help over the past couple of days. “Well, Zak and I need a drink.” Nick said, hopping off his stool.   
“There’s a waitress around here somewhere.” Billy said, trying to track her down.   
“That’s okay, I’ll go up to the bar. Shots and beers all around!” He said, laughing at the protests that followed as he walked away.   
“Ugh...this bastard is going to get me drunk again.” Aaron said with a chuckle. “I swear, I still haven’t recovered from the other night.” Zak laughed weakly. He really did not want to talk about that night at all. “You must have been feeling it too. You never miss our meetings!” Aaron continued.   
“Yeah...I definitely had a bit too much.” Zak agreed hoping the conversation would end there.   
“We thought maybe you ended up taking that brunette home.” Aaron said with a sly smile. “I’d miss a meeting for her too.” Zak laughed awkwardly searching for a way to end the conversation before Nick got back.   
“Nah...she’s not really my type. Not these days.” Zak said answering honestly.   
“Well, she’s my type. All day, every day.” Aaron said with a laugh before changing the subject. “So were there any good EVPs?”   
“What?” Zak asked, confused but grateful for the subject change.   
“Did you find any good EVPs?” He said a bit louder.   
“Oh!” Zak said remembering Billy’s lie. “A couple decent ones. Nothing class A though.” Zak was happy to see Nick making his way over with a tray of drinks. Hopefully that would be enough to distract Aaron from asking for examples. And thankfully it was.   
“Dude, what the hell?” Aaron laughed, shaking his head after seeing that Nick had followed through on his promise to bring back shots. In fact, he’d brought back a whole bottle.   
“Come on, man. We’re celebrating!” Nick said handing a beer and a shot to Aaron before making his way to Billy.   
“Celebrating what?” Billy asked, staring in defeat at what was sure to be the first of many shots. Nick made his way to Zak, placing the tray in front of him. He was grinning ear to ear with that sly look that gave Zak nervous butterflies. But before Zak could question what he was up to, Nick’s hands wrapped around the nape of his neck, pulling him in and pressing their lips together firmly. By the time his brain caught up with what was happening, Nick was standing between his legs, their bodies pressed tightly together. Zak worked to steady his breath as Nick broke the kiss. He could feel redness crawling up his neck and face as he turned to face his shell-shocked friends. They sat staring silently as their brains worked, putting two and two together. Zak shot a nervous glance to Nick who returned it with a wide smile at his accomplishment.   
“You guys should see your faces.” Nick laughed.   
“Nick…” Zak scolded.  
“Well, come on. Don’t you have anything you want to say?” Nick said, addressing their silent friends. “Or ask?”  
“I….um…” Aaron started, still trying to sort out what he’d just seen.   
“We wanted you guys to be the first to know.” Zak said timidly. Still unsure about how Billy and Aaron were taking the news.   
“I think it’s great.” Billy said breaking his silence with a smile. Zak smiled back, feeling relief wash over him. He leaned into Nick who reached out to wrap an arm around his waist.   
“She’s not your type these days.” Aaron said finally, looking at Zak. “And the waitress from the other night…” He said directing his stare to Nick who laughed at the sudden recognition on his face. “It’s all making so much sense now.” Zak couldn’t help but laugh too. He was pretty sure Billy had at least had some idea, but he knew how big a shock this must have been for Aaron. “To Nick and Zak!” Aaron said suddenly, raising his glass, “Up until five minutes ago I had no idea. But now that I know, I can’t think of anything that makes more sense.” Zak grinned as he raised his glass to join the rest of them in a toast, whispering a quick “love you” to Nick as their glasses clinked together.


End file.
